Thank you Beautiful Peoples
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I am incredibly tired today. Weary in the head.. I just want to sleep. This house hunting thing is really getting to me. We actually got offered one yesterday but turned it down because there were so many issues with it, things that needed to be fixed & the Owner's just weren't interested in fixing them...
I looked a 3 houses yesterday & applied for 2 of them, so fingers crossed etc that we get accepted for one of them today...
I went to go drop off an application form this morning & I ended up going to the wrong Agent.. I then realised that the Agents I was looking for were way back up where I had parked my car. So after the rather long walk back, then up the stairs I was thinking, I just want to eat. Walking back to my car I let the thoughts flood through my brain, why do you want to eat, why do you want to eat that??! I phoned hubby & said to him, isn't it amazing how when I feel stressed & tired the first thing I think of is food. Yesterday I felt a bit the same but all I craved was an extra apple or maybe another crispbread (succeeded at saying a big fat NO to myself :P ).. but today I was thinking ooo bacon & eggs or chocolate & cheezels.. oh AND a movie.. nothing like denial LOL.. So I'm proud of myself today. I am seeing the trigger that use to set me off and now I'm learning to just reason with myself & I'm OK....
I realise now more than ever, even though I'm sure I've said this before.. food to me is like drugs to a druggie or alcohol to the alcoholic .. I will always have these emotional issues, so I jut have to continue to stay strong & be totally honest with myself.. I need to keep my drive, I need to stay positive & I need to stay away from foods that are poison to me, the foods that make me fat..
I'm still 100% deviation free & I'm so proud of myself for that. I have NEVER in my life felt so strong & in control. My thoughts are just thoughts, they don't make me who I am. What I do with those thoughts is what makes me me.