Donzie 2.0 in 2020

[Donzie]

Week 10 Day 2 (Size 12)

I have sat down to write in my diary about 5 times now, but my thoughts keep changing and I have found it hard to commit any words to the page.

Initially I began writing words of fear. Fear of how fast our world has changed in the last few weeks. Fear for my parents in their 70s and fear for our economy. There was another post about the fear I felt for America and the hopeless situation we are seeing over there. Fear about our vulnerable place in todays world and what will be the broader fallout in it all.

But, today the fear has subsided. It’s still there, but what is the point? To fear and worry about something before it happens only means to suffer twice if it does happen. The fact is, it’s a beautiful day outside. I have a roof over my head, and currently healthy family. I live in a country with a robust safety net and health care system. I am safe and I am well.

My responsibility here is to sit tight in our house and think thoughts of hope, calm and opportunity. To focus on life after this COVID-19 period. Yes, it will change our world possibly forever, but it will also give us the opportunity to do things better. To hit the reset button.

The truth is the world ends for someone somewhere every minute of everyday and there is no guarantee it won’t be us. I will not waste time worrying about things I cannot change. I will not. It’s a beautiful day outside and I get to experience that beauty right now. I am safe, and I am well.

So, with that out of the way.

Things have been going well. The total lack of social anything has been a great opportunity for me to just focus 100% on the EP completely and unselfconsciously. I’ve been fortunate in finding the necessary food I need, so it’s been all systems go, and on a physcial level I am feeling really good.

I am waking up rested and energised. I have the energy I need to keep on top of the physical demands of keeping the house reasonably tidy and organised with two kids homeschooling and adults working. The days are passing very quickly now. I had to remind myself what day of the week it is - Wednesday in case your also wondering.

My poor dog doesn’t understand why we aren’t taking her to the park on these gorgeous Autumn days. But she gets a very early morning walk at 5.30am each morning so she will be fine.

I’m into my size 12 jeans now. Actually I’m wearing my size 13’s today and they are getting loose and slouchy just the way I like them. I have been having fun shopping my wardrobe, and wearing many things that have been tucked away in the back for a couple of years. I am in my own little bubble really, enjoying the wonderful experience of slipping on things that didn’t fit 6 weeks ago but do now. It’s a lovely place to be in.

Life has gotten simple really. The rush of school, work, home, repeat, has stopped/slowed. I know it might not stay this way for too long, but for now I am going to try and see it as an opportunity. I know there are many working in hospitals and service jobs that would love to be at home now. My job is to stop, stay in, work my EP and be grateful. For I am safe and I am well.

Till next time.

Donzie. X