This..is..it's Diary

[this..is..it!]

Woo Hoo..... a real diary!! LOL! I am feeling like I am not the newbie anymore! Even though I still have a verrrry long way to go.......

Tonight will be the end of my third week. I have heard all about the week three let down (slow weight loss) but I am unaware if I have been effected as I have not weighed myself since last Tuesday at the clinic. I will measure myself tonight and I am going to the gym later so I will weigh myself there and see if it has budged this week. I feel like my work pants are fitting nicely. Not snug as a bug! And these are the work pants I pulled out of retirement after my "pants incident" last week. (The old work ones were falling down, these ones are smaller!)

So I am happy bowling along, DF - so far so good!

Heres to another good week and another bit closer to getting back to me!

[lil_doll]

LOL, I felt the same way when my diary got moved, TII! haha...

You sound quite pumped! Keep it up lady!

xoxo
Missy

[this..is..it!]

Today is my official day 1 of week 4.....

I am sitting here munching on the YUMMIEST apple as I type away.. *CRUNCH CRUNCH*

So I went to the gym last night and my trainer was like "OMG you look so different". Nice to hear I have to admit. Even though I feel embarrassed that I even look like this. *hangs head in shame*
I did have to hop onto her scales and they showed from last week I am down about 1.6kgs. (her scales are very diferent to the clinic) So I am not going to move my old ticker until I get THE WORD or should I say THE NUMBER from the clinic scales at my week 4 weigh in next Tuesday. (looking forward to that )

Apple finished..mmmm Yum!

Today I am wearing a skirt to work that I have not dared try on pretty much all year and it fits soooo loose. Feels good!

Wishing everyone fast fat burning!!! (including me!)

[this..is..it!]

ARHHH..... CRAPPOLA!!!!!

I have just read that you are not meant to use Keens curry powder! Guess what I have been using a good few times per week? Keens Curry powder!!!

Trying not to go into melt down....*breathe!* I rang the clinic and they said to just check the label which I will do as soon as I get home form work.

Until then....... just breathe!!!!

[Kohinoor]

Hi TII,

Don't worry at all, darl - it's in the past now (nothing can be done to UNDO it - so don't stress, OK?)

Go have a look here :-
Check YOUR Curry Powder !! (aka CURRY- The bane of my existence)
DO NOTE TOO - that only recently, the "recommended" curry was also found to contain some "bad stuff". Do read Asy's comments all the way through this thread. It is quite an education !!!

As I recall, Keens could have you NOT losing Kgs too well - so, the good news is that your rate of Kg shedding may well improved markedly from here on..... THAT can't be bad eh?

And read Asy's latest post re Clive of India CAREFULLY - she leaves the choice up to you (it doesn't affect some people - your choice whether to go for it or not.....).

Koh

[this..is..it!]

Hey Koh,

Thanks for the input and the calm down pill! LOL!

Will have a further look at that thread. (that is where I was looking this morning and found out my crappy news! hmph!)

I might just bail on curry altogether, too risky perhaps? Bit of a shame because I enjoyed the flavour and funny enough, curry is not normally something I like!

To think I could have lost more in the past three weeks???? Oh well.... I think I am sitting on a loss in the vicinity of 6.8kgs in 3 weeks. I am happy and very grateful for my results!

Moving on now.................................

[this..is..it!]

Originally Posted by lil_doll

LOL, I felt the same way when my diary got moved, TII! haha...

You sound quite pumped! Keep it up lady!

xoxo
Missy

Thanks Missy Sorry I missed this message before with all my curry in a hurry panic!! *headless chook!* I am feeling pumped, well a little tired today but still pumped! Hope all is well with you, lovely lady!

So I went home yesterday and checked my stupid curry powder and yes it has rice flour in it. So that is a big NO hey? And also this morning while eating my egg, I had a look at my salt and guess what? Anti caking agent so another big NO! Man o man, good lesson to learn. Read labels! I always do normally but never for those things in the past. It has always been for fat and sugar content. Nice learning curve!

Like many others I have started using the bio oil. Love how it feels and hopefully it will help my skin from the outside as cohens is doing it thing on the inside. I wish I could just be dipped into a massive vat after every shower! (sorry for the mental image!)

Feeling a little bit tired today as my little boy decided to be getting up every half hour for about 2 hours in the wee hours of this morning, hope he is not getting sick! Looking forward to an early bed time tonight!

Off to do some work, or maybe read some diaries? Probably the later!

[lil_doll]

I just wanted to pop in and say a big THANK YOU for all your support in my diary... it means a lot to me

Meanwhile, LOL at "curry in a hurry".. my heart sank when I read the post about the curries... *sigh. I did read somewhere on this lovely forum a mixture of herbs to mix yourself that is quite tasty. Perhaps you could investigate. I have just been avoiding it, not necessarily forever but just for now I haven't had any curry powder.

I actually found a different spice, that I have been using (or should I say over-using), it is "Mexican Chilli" from Masterfoods... I know we're are supposed to avoid blended spices but I checked the ingredients on the bottle and also online, and there was nothing suspicious... And it is YUM! I have it on steak, chicken and prawns (making like a yum spicy soup type thing)... it is sooooo yum.

I've been lazy with the bio-oil lately... I need to get into the habit! I think I need the vat, like you, haha.

Hope your little boy is feeling okay and didn't get sick... and I hope you are doing fantastically... you DESERVE it!

Ciao for now, sweetie,

Missy

[this..is..it!]

Thanks Missy! Its funny how we all have never met yet I feel like we are all in this together! Great suport system, I love it and don't know how I would have done without it!

I will have to check out that spice! I have stayed away from curry powder since reading and having heart failure about Keens! I found Spencers - Curry Powder Indian Mild which has Coriander, tumeric, chilli, cinnamon, cumin, fennel, fenugreek, salt and garlic in it. I am going to check with the clinic BEFORE I use it to see if it is OK! *feel free to chime in everyone if you know about it*

Speaking of the clinic........

I have my week four weigh in and bloods on Tuesday!! WOW it has just FLOWN by! I wish I had of had that light bulb moment to get on Cohens a month before I did, instead of just lurking around, because I could imagine how I would be feeling if I was in week 8 now! Never mind, it happened when it did and I have the results I have, so far! AND.........

I could not help myself. I stepped onto the scales this morning because I actually woke up feeling very different this morning?? And *crossing fingers* don't jinx my weigh in, but I was 79.8KGS!!! Freeky deek.... under 80kgs!! I am praying that the clinic scales are not too different to mine! Oh well, I have 2 more days to secure the deal (to be in the 70's) Oh man, I am so relieved. I am feeling good but also anxious about Tuesday..

[lil_doll]

Ooooh the 70's are calling!!! Good luck with your 4 week weigh in! I'm sure it'll be great. And I so know what you mean about wishing you had started earlier-- I lurked for like a year!!!!!!!!!!!!! A YEAR!!!! But, really, I don't think I was ready then, so I am still grateful I am here and on the program now

Also, re: the curry, I think fenugreek is not allowed... *sigh

[Kohinoor]

Hi TII,

Aww, you are STEAMING ! This "anxious" thing must be a girl thing.

Oh man, I am so relieved. I am feeling good but also anxious about Tuesday..

You are gunna be FINE on Tuesday !! I'm married, so I know how it goes (but I DON'T understand ) I say to my Mrs, "A day is not a day without a good worry eh?" - she seems to "worry" about things that are just NOT on my radar at all.... Hmm, so it HAS to be a "girl" thing

Stay true, TII, and Tuesday will bring a positive affirmation for you

Koh

[this..is..it!]

Thanks Koh,

Yep, must be a girl thing. I think we are just wired that way - with the worry gene! LOL! (I know I am!)

Well nothing much to really report today, still plugging away..... drinking my water, being good and now it is time for lunch so bye bye have a great day everyone!

[this..is..it!]

Today is the day! The end of week 4 and my official week 4 weigh in at the clinic is after work, then I will head on to get blood taken.

4 weeks really doesn't take long does it? Wow and the results in just 4 weeks is so exciting. I am feeling more like "me" again. Today I am actually starting to feel less disgusted in myself and more like I am on the right track and to even acknowldege that is nothing short of a miracle in itself.

I am looking forward to moving that little ticker tonight! Woo Hoo!

Numbers are ticking over in my head and I am wondering what I could lose before xmas? I am aware my body will lose what it wants but there is no harm in having a little goal is there? Because I am going away for xmas I am saying there is 3 weeks to go.... Is 5kgs realistic? That is an average of just under 1.7kgs each week. Do-able? Maybe. That is what I would like anyway. Just keep drinking that water and getting lots of good sleep and trust that Cohens works, look what it has done so far! LOL!

I guess until it is ticker moving time... ciao for now!!

[lil_doll]

Oooh goodluck for your weigh in, TII!!!! You'll blow it out of the water!!!

And there is definately nothing wrong with a little goal, even an adventurous one! 5 kilos is sooo do-able!!

Looking forward to seeing your ticker move!!!

Oh and I knew I had mentioned my precious Mexican Chilli spice to someone on here, and it was YOU!

Oh and you sound great... Horray for feeling less disgusted! LOL!!! I have occasional moments like that- but most of the time I forget to stop and smell the roses, but generally speaking, I can look down at my feet and realise 'hey my big GUT is disappearing'!

xoxo
Missy

[this..is..it!]

I AM UNDER 80KGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(just 'A BIT' excited about that!)

Woo hoo! I had my week 4 weigh in and blood test yesterday and feel like I have accomplished something. Even though I still have a fair way to go I kind of feel like week 4 was like phase one, make any sense??? In my head it does and for me big tick off the list phase one!! YAY!!

My results were cms lost 34.4 cm and kilos lost 9.5. So close to 10 but no cigar, I am still one happy chappy and guess what? This morning when i stood on the scales it was well and truely 10kgs gone! But I am only going to update my ticker with yesterdays results. I will use my scale reading from home and update weekly from here on in as I am comfortable my scales and the clinic scales are not that different. (Is that sounding like a bit of confidence there? I don't believe it! LOL)

Well I can not wait to go and update my ticker so I am out of here! Wishing everyone a fantastic day.

an under 80kg Kat! x

[lil_doll]

YAY!!!!

Congratulations getting into the 70's!!!!

So very proud of you!!!!

[Mette]

Congrats on being a 70s girl!!!


Keep up the great work!!

[this..is..it!]

Thank you LD and Mette for the dancing cows and nana's! They are sooo cool!

I have been bowling along nicely... All good. Tomorrow however maybe a challenge!!

When I say challenge, I don't mean with food or drink, even though there will be PLENTY of it! I mean a challenge in having to explain myself perhaps and I don't think I am ready for that yet.

At the begining of this journey and diary I explained that I am not telling ANYONE about what I am doing, because of previous attempt after attempt of EVERYTHING and not getting anywhere. Well that is all still so. I still have not told anyone about what I am doing with the exception of my personal trainer at the gym. (The clinic said I should tell her so my exercise program could be adjusted accordingly)

It has only been in the past couple of days that I have "bumped into" a few of friends out and about (separate occassions) and the reaction was "WOW you have lost some weight" or "You are looking really well, what are you doing?" I have so far managed to brush it off with a response like 'oh yeah, I have lost a little bit' and moved on to a different subject. Only one friend has pressed it further to find out what I am actually doing. It felt awkward. I danced around saying things like 'oh mainly just eating protien and salads, not eating crap food, not drinking alcohol and drinking LOADS of water'

I am NOT ready to let the cat out of the bag yet. I still have a long way to go. Maybe when I am on the home straight I will open up. At this point I want to internalise it and just stay focussed.

The other BIG issue I have, and please bear with this one as is it may seem stupid. I am embarassed that I ever ended up like this and I just want the weight to go away and I freak out at the thought of people ever being able to add up the kilos I have lost and have a good guess at what I weighed. (this forum is the ONLY place I have EVER reported my weight! Denial I guess) I know how rediculous that may sound, vain even perhaps but I am just so ashamed of where I ended up. And when I look at under 80kgs I know that might look good on paper - or screen haha- but in reality I am only about 160cm which makes 78kgs on my body still in the OBESE section of BMI - that is not good. I just want it over and was hoping I could just fade into the background and get it done with no hoopla. So therefore, I have been laying low! LOL!

PHEW man, that was A LOT of getting stuff off my chest now, wasn't it? I think Dr Phil would even get a laugh out of that one. Now on a lighter side.....

So anyway, tomorrow a group of my girlfriends are all getting together and there will be plenty of drinking and eating and I am cool with not deviating. No problem there. What is going to be the uncomfortable bit is explaining why i don't want any. Because clearly, that is NOT my usual behaviour or response!!! hahaha!

Oh well, I am looking forward to it anyway and instead of taking a bottle of champers and nibbles I am going to take sparkling mineral water and an apple to chop up! It is going to be a beautiful day and I am looking forward to seeing all my friends.

Well I think I have actually dribbled on enough. This would probably be the biggest post I have ever done on here! LOL! Must be feeling right at home now. Thanks to you all for sharing your honest thoughts and feelings as we go on this journey, because with out them I would have NEVER opened up like this (and I have NEVER before been this open about my weight) So thank you heaps!

Cheers Guys! (but only with sparkling mineral water at this point! LOL!!!)xx

[Mum Chum]

You are writing my story. I also still haven't told anyone - altho a couple of people (family) know my friend who succeeded and have asked if I'm doing the same as her. I have been honest and said yes to them and they have been great encouragers since then.
I also am embarrassed about how heavy I actually got (and am not sure if I will ever tell anyone outside of this forum, how much I actually lost, but at least now I am doing something about it.
One of my daughters was married in April, and I tried really hard to lose weight before her wedding (not very successfully unfortunately), but after her wedding I averaged putting on about 2 kg per month (10KG - can't believe it - and its extra that I have to lose now).
Enjoy your day tomorrow - and go with whatever happens - just don't deviate. lol
I'm sure your friends will be delighted that you have finally found something that works and be full of encouragement. Will be thinking of you. Again - enjoy your day

[this..is..it!]

Hi There Mum Chum and thank you so much for your comment. x

Weight is such a personal thing isn't it? I have to say I feel like it is my guarded secret and I think those around me know it without me even having to say anything. I guess attached to my weight is my disgust and disbelief that I ended up the size I did. I avoid talking about at ALL costs! This forum has allowed me to open up about it and deal with it, in an environment that I feel safe that I am not being judged.

And we are both doing something about it now and as much as I have been in denial of all those feelings, I am facing it head on now! You have lost 16kg's already! That is sooo good! Lets keep on chipping away at this thing!

*****

So yesterday went off without too much trouble! NO DEVIATING AT ALL and not even a thought of doing so! I took my sparkling mineral water and apple and no sooner was I in the door and the champers was being offered! I politely declined and said I had bought along my own special bubbles and delcared I am not drinking at the moment.

Yes, there was a disbelieving pause and look from EVERYONE in the room, but it went down OK and I followed it up with "I am doing everything I can to get healthy" one friend commmented "good for you, whatever you are doing is great because you are looking really well" My sparkling mineral water was served in a lovely champagne glass and when asked if they could pop a strawberry in, I said no thanks I love it just by itself!

Phew, alcohol challenge - PASSED!

Next obstacle...... Food

Another friend busy in the kitchen cooking up a storm and all kinds of beatiful things were being pumped out of the kitchen. Offer after offer I politley declined, without even flinching and I think after the first NO THANK YOU it was clear to everyone I meant business. Instead of tasting the food my friend made, I chatted away to her asking her how did she make it, what was in it etc.... I was still involved, just not tasting it! LOL! Cheeky! I complimented her on how delicious it looked and smelt!

So I left the get together deviation free, head held high and with my friends perhaps a little shocked at my choices but all in accepting of my stand. What a relief!

Tonight I am doing my measurements again and this mornings peek at the scales said 77.6kgs. So..... I did say I was going to update weekly and this is the first time I have ever updated just going by my home scales. *gulp* but anyhoo, thats what I am going to do!!

So off I go to update my ticker and then catch up on reading some diaries etc.. for some motivation! Have a great week everyone!

Kat xx