tomorrowisnow's diary - Page 4

tomorrowisnow · #61 31-07-2009, 14:56

I went and done my normal weekly grocery shopping today and it took me twice as long as normal since everyman and his bulldog wants to know 'the secret'. One lady (who I don't really know that well) even told me that I shouldn't loose anymore weight as I am already looking a little on the skinny side and I wouldn't want to look annorexic lol. I chuckled about that one - when I was 18 I was around 48kgs after dropping probably 6 kg's or so and I copped the whole annorexic speil back then. I was so devestated that was what people were thinking that I started overeating to prove I wasn't - and look where that got me...failed Jenny Craig, failed Weight Watchers, failed Tony Ferguson, failed reductil, failed excessive exercise, failed calorie counting....

This lady then starting asking me my 'secret', I said there was no secret, the only thing I hvae done this time that failed me every other time is to stick with it no matter what - I told her she could do it on Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers or any other program or plan as long as she was determined. I was saying to her that there are plenty of times you want cake or lollies but you just dont let yourself - she said oh that's not my problem I COULD NEVER GIVE UP BEER. I was rolling my eyes in my head thinking I am not wasting my time telling you about Cohen's. Aren't I terrible! If that was a close friend I would tell them but she wasn't, I barely know her and here she was giving me a lecture (or so it felt). Keep your annorexic comments to yourself I thought, that is the reason I am in this bloody trouble!

Anyways, gripe aside everyone else's comments are very positive and I making sure those are the ones I pay attention to.

I am also becoming very hopeful that I will get to my 54kg goal by the 1st September now my weight has started coming off again, I have started going for a small walk each day as recommended by my clinic (for my slow losses) and I gotta say it was the best thing I ever did. I love it. I just take my time enjoying the weather and the birds flying by - how I miss exercising!!

Shazza/2 · #62 31-07-2009, 21:47

You have had an amazing weight loss so far, and you are so close to your goal. Well done on your achievement.

Learning not to care about the strange comments of others is a hard part of this journey. Even though I am only halfway, I have had a few people caution me "not to go too far" or "not to lose too much weight" for the weirdest reasons like it might make me look older or sick or something. Or I might become obsessed with being skinny. They are very strange comments, and I simply let them go.

Anyway, well done and keep on going!

Trude · #63 13-08-2009, 15:00

Hi Howz it going you haven't got long to go before you will be on refeed. I bet your feeling great and looking unreal. I'm going really good myself it's been 4 weeks for me now and 9.2 kgs lost and still going strong. Any way I will keep popping in on you from time to time. Trudie

Namaste · #64 14-08-2009, 04:36

Yooooo Hoooooo!
Tomorrow Is Now - where are you?
Missing your posts - Hope all is well in your world.

Big Hugs,

Nam

tomorrowisnow · #65 19-08-2009, 18:54

Hey there Trude and Nam!! Glad someone has missed me. I have been lurking a little lately not really wanting to post much as I havent been feeling like myself. I have been STARVING, I mean that ravenous crazy woman hungry type and it's not been nice. I am so exhausted and run down despite having early nights and ignorning my bodies signals for the past 2 weeks I finally rang my clinic...I have my re-feed and I am starting on Monday.

On one hand I am SO EXCITED because this is the moment I have worked so hard for but on the other I am disapointed. Disapointed because I haven't quite got there numbers wise, I always had it in my head that I would make it to 52kg's (54 at least!) and I suppose the pessimist in me is saying I have failed (...again!).

Sue at the Brisbane clinic was SO GREAT, she was informative and reasurring but also sympathetic of how I felt about starting early. She assured me that my 'success' was not getting to that magic number but getting to my bodies metobolic equilibrium and mine just happened to be a bit above Dr Cohen's range.

I am really happy with where I am at, fitting into size 10's and feeling fantastic (up until the refeed symptoms kick in that is) so I know I shouldn't be disapointed over a number.

Anyways I have a 19 day refeed and I have planned to start on Monday since I have to travel on the weekend but I must say deviating is on my mind constantly. I am drinking heaps of water (even had some diet soft drink for the first time this week) plus chewies to curb the hunger... it's not really working but that ontop of being really busy is helping :-/

Please keep your fingers crossed that I can make it through my refeed and maintain this weight forever, I can't have Cohen's being another one of those darn failed 'diets' too!

Thanks for visiting my diary.

FlaMie · #66 19-08-2009, 19:06

Hi TIN,

So sorry to hear about your hunger. Just wondering if that hunger has anything to do with possible TOM?

I'm trying to ignore the hunger as far as possible and I don't think I've got to your state where you seem so impossibly hungry. I believe not everyone is hungry at this end stage. So, I'm trying to ignore the hunger and I believe the mind is stronger than the body so we can convince our body that we aren't hungry actually. I could be wrong.

Happy for ya starting refeed. Woweee, you are ahead of me and carrieanne. Heheeh I thought carrieanne would be the next candidate on refeed. Whatever the case, all the best on refeed and hope you complete the programme as a much happier person

.

Cohen will not be another failed diet because you are a living example of success. The rest is up to you dear

tomorrowisnow · #67 19-08-2009, 19:06

AND SHAZZA - Sorry I forgot you there matey!! People are so funny aren't they, no wonder they are commenting on your loss - you have done so well. 46kg's is a massive number and I bet you look so different to them now (and yourself). You should be so proud, we need to hold our heads up high and don't let anyone convince us to stop until we're ready lol!! It's always the 'chubbier' ones I find that think they should comment about not goign to far and once upon a time that might have been me - afraid that the person may succeed where I had continually failed perhaps. Anyways, hopefully one day those same knockers may look at us and be inspired by our success more so than intimidate them or remind them about their own past failures.

maria1969yellow · #68 19-08-2009, 19:12

Hi thought I would pop in as Im finally starting to catch up with all your amazing inspirational diaries..

I had to laugh at your last post as I was cornered by friends at home and well they were trying to intervene saying I was mad and I had to stop as I had lost enough.. (I was 9kgs over high end of my target) Yep they should keep their opinions to themselves but hey your nearly there now and Im sure your bod will shed those unwanted extra kgs in refeed land which will be great to see how your body responds to that.

Awesome work...

tomorrowisnow · #69 19-08-2009, 19:18

Hey Flaime, yes the mind is very strong isn't it! I have not long finished my monthly's so not due again for at least 3 weeks. That was my first thought when the hunger started so I just kept ignorning it, soon it becomes too much to keep passing off as that type of craving hunger that I am all to familure with. I started getting this really aweful feeling in my chest/stomach like a burning feeling along with pain and constant rumbling tummy about an hour after eating. My meals are just not satisfying me anymore which is really odd since I have been quite happy up until now and I had never even contemplated deviating until these last few weeks. Food is always on my mind and you feel CRAZY. I am waking up with my hunger pains and the back ache!! Oh my god I thought it was just a 'refeed myth' but it's soooo true. I have been 'surviving' by trying to sleep/rest whenever I can and not having anything tempting in the house at all. I also eat my meals exactly 5 hours apart, I am cooked and ready to go right on the dot cause I couldn't stand it even 1 minute longer. Crazy hey.

If you are able to ignore your hunger maybe you can go a bit lower. I am so jealous (in a good way!) that you cracked the 55's. My weight has stalled at 57.2 and wont budge - i have been here for 2 weeks which is another reason the clinic says I am ready.

Thanks for popping in to say Hi, I hope you can get past your monthly's and join me in refeed land so you, me and CarrieAnne can cruise through it together!

Newloser · #70 19-08-2009, 19:59

Hi TIN ...
Congrats on YOUR refeed goal... listen to your body. Start your refeed enjoy it and again..... CONGRATULATIONS!!

YOU DID IT!

Kohinoor · #71 19-08-2009, 20:23

Hi TIN,

I would think your clinic would have also suggested adding "a little more food" (like Day1 of refeed) just to help you through - 'cos, when it's time, IT's TIME !!

And I just wanted to accentuate this too (you might've read it in Shellbelle's diary - but I want it to be in YOURS too, for good reason)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kohinoor

Whatever you do, DON'T ever entertain any thoughts of "failure" (as so many girls seem to get hung up on when they are focussed on "a number"). Your body has spoken.... 'nuff said.

TIN, you're talking of "holding out till Monday" because of some social event - OK, it's your call - but you might find it progressively harder (and even dangerous?) to put your body's needs "on the back burner". It may well be better to get "just that bit more sustenance" into your bod, so that you don't fall over and do yourself a mischief !!

Once more, when it's time, IT's TIME !! At least consider eating that little bit more, just to get you through SAFELY to Monday - when you can then start Day 2 !!!

Take care, girl,

Hugs,

Koh

tomorrowisnow · #72 19-08-2009, 21:22

Oh Koh you are so wise lol! You have no idea what you have just written means to me! You are so right about the number side of things, I have been telling myself exactly this (but not truely believing it) since I received my refeed. The main reason I am waiting til Monday (aside from travel) IS because I am still holding out that I may just crack 56kg's, which will be the recommended 2kg's above my goal range. The clinic mentioned extra food but I haven't had it for these reasons also.

Reading your reply to Shellbelles and myself just really hit home for me.... I am being damn CRAZY. This is just a number and I am NOT a failure...I am starting to add the extra food as directed as of tomorrow.

Thankyou 'ol wise one, I think that is just what I needed to hear!

Shellbelle · #73 19-08-2009, 21:29

Hi TIN,

You are so right, i felt like I was reading my own posts on your diary too!!

I am with Koh, try eating a bit more food. I received my refeed last Friday and ate the day 1 quota for 4 days before I officially started. The extra food did help a little. I would highly recommend it- and it is not a deviation.

I am not sure how complicated your refeed is, mine is very simple for the first 10 days. Would starting now cause significant problems- wouldn't you have to weigh your food anyway?

I am over feeling guilty- it is now time to celebrate!!!

Kohinoor · #74 19-08-2009, 21:40

Go "refeed sisters" !!

It's so good to hear that you two have connected. Each can draw on the experience of the other.

TIN, I'm glad my post meant something to you. It seemed to be the right thing when I posted it.

You girls can get caught up in "getting to the number" without being aware that sometimes the number is not quite right for you. I guess the fact that I'm "way out in left field" can be a help at times, as I don't have the same coloured glasses on.

I'm just glad it has helped,

Now, you two just "Rock on" and ace that refeed - you won't believe how good you'll feel in just a few more days

Hugs to both of you,

Koh

Namaste · #75 19-08-2009, 21:57

Oh the relief...I was a little worried that I may have to bring my rolled up newspaper to discipline you with, but Koh did it gently, and wisely.

YAY! You see....Tomorrow really is now for you!

You are a TOTAL success, and if you start to think any different, visualise me tapping my foot impatiently, and slapping the rolled up newspaper against my hand, meanly...ready to come and get you.

Well Done TIN, enjoy your refeed, and acknowledge your SUCCESS, just how far you've come, you so DESERVE it.

Big Hugs,

Nam

Kohinoor · #76 19-08-2009, 22:04

Quote:

Originally Posted by Namaste

visualise me tapping my foot impatiently, and slapping the rolled up newspaper against my hand, meanly...ready to come and get you.

You're a funny bugger (meant in the nicest way

)

Koh

Kohinoor · #77 19-08-2009, 22:13

Hi TIN,

Quote:

The main reason I am waiting til Monday (aside from travel) IS because I am still holding out that I may just crack 56kg's, which will be the recommended 2kg's above my goal range. The clinic mentioned extra food but I haven't had it for these reasons also.

I've watched others as they proceeded to drop MORE weight AFTER they fed their bodies more (but only when they got to this same point as you are at). Will this happen for you? Hmm, PASS - I dunno - but I won't be surprised if it DOES happen.

As we know, when the body is STARVING, you will drop less weight - it will hang on to every bit of sustenance it can get (how long will the famine last?). THEN you feed it a little more, and it relaxes again......

And, guess what? With you feeding it a little more, YOU relax a little more too, so STRESS drops off too... OMG, could this be a recipe for success?

Let's see how you go, TIN - your wildest dreams may yet come true. But, if not, you have the recipe to make it happen at some opportune time down the track.

Koh

Shellbelle · #78 19-08-2009, 22:36

hey TIN, I meant to mention in my earlier post that between adding a bit more food and today I lost 1.3 kilos (in 5 days). That was just eating day 1 quantities for the 5 days.

tomorrowisnow · #79 20-08-2009, 07:19

Geez my scales DO NOT WANT TO MOVE. I am 57.2 kg's AGAIN. I am going up then down, up then down - it reads 57.5 one day, then 57.3 then 57.2 - always settling on 57.2!! Talk about frustrating. I have been this weight for 9 days and my loss before that 7 days earlier was 500g. So 16 days really I have been stuck in this range arrrrrrrrrrrrrggggh. Oh well.

You have made me see sense and I am starting some extra food today so I hope like you Shellbelle I can shift a little more, but if not that's good too.

Shelle - I am glad that I am not alone also! Onwards and upwards with our new lives hey!!! No more disapointment in ourselves, just pure pride!!

Koh - you have a great way with saying things and putting it all in perspective. You may think it's the way your man brain works but I just think your wonderful. Thanks again.

Nam - I woudln't mind me a newpaper floggin once and a while heheeh but not now, I bruise really easily lately. Thanks for always bringing a smile to my face!

Newloser - thank you also for your support matey!

It's my little man's 4th birthday today, I have baked a bunch of cute cupcakes and have all his little prezzies wrapped and waiting for him to wake up so I can shower him with kisses and cuddles. He's my youngest and still definatly my baby so being 4 seems soooo old. It's gonna be a great day.

I will let you know how I all go with the extra food and might even apply for my refeed diary.

FlaMie · #80 20-08-2009, 11:22

Hey TIN, hope your little man has a wonderful day today! It is his day and he deserves to have it his way

Have you tried drinking tea at night or before bed? Whenever I take tea, I find weight loss the next day. I didn't take tea yesterday night and there's no loss this morning. I doubt it is a coincidence. You might just want to give it a shot and see if it has a positive reaction to move that weight. All the BEST lady.