Deviate - ion

[jackie]

Hello

In my Personal Eating Plan, it says that even a slight deviation will cost up to a week of progress. What is a slight deviation? A burger, a potato chip? I have got a number of social engagements coming up and would like to know what I can do. As it appears that I can't eat out while I am on the program. Is that true?

Jackie

[kagiesen]

Quite frankly, yes!

Eat before, then hold onto a diet drink for the night. It's not easy. Slight deviation means eg having one more cracker than allowed, which mean that your hunger won't be curbed as much as if you were sticking to it slavishly. Easiest is to not think about deviation at all and just have what you're allowed in the quantities allowed.

Katrin

[heavenlylamb]

Originally Posted by jackie

Hello

In my Personal Eating Plan, it says that even a slight deviation will cost up to a week of progress. What is a slight deviation? A burger, a potato chip? I have got a number of social engagements coming up and would like to know what I can do. As it appears that I can't eat out while I am on the program. Is that true?

Jackie

There are a number of us who have to eat out regularly for work or travel.... at times it can't be avoided.
If I stick to plain meat and salad, I don't consider that a deviation.... If you know what restaurant you are going to, you can ask them to measure out the portions. I've never done this - just tried to limit the size of what I'm eating. Obviously, no desert or bread or pasta! If I'm going to an event, I always order a special meal and I'm quite specific about what I want.. no carbs, meat with salad, balsamic vinegar dressing etc.
Buffets and nibbles are a disaster for me, but if its a restaurant, I can nearly always find something to eat without blowing the plan. I would avoid any potato chips, nuts etc........ is it possible to stop at just one?!!!!!! I find it impossible to have a taste of those sorts of things wihtout completely losing it.
Also, think about what you are going to drink. I normally drink sparkling water, cause I don't like soft drinks so much.
I tell those I'm out to dinner with that I'm on a special diet for medical reasons if they try to convince me to eat food I shouldn't.
There are a few threads discussing strategies for eating out. So, if you need to, have a look through those and see what others have found works for them.
Pen

[jackie]

Thanks for the responses. I will have few food tests coming up soon - and will try to order the meat and veg combo with out the sauces, chips etc to get me through the social event. When I first read my program it seemed like going out to eat was a definite 'no, no'.

Do you ever not order anything - just a have an allowed drink - so that you can still get out with your friends? Is that acceptable to our friends and family? I am so used to drinking and eating because my friends expect me to join in - also because I enjoy it - that eating just 'my medicine' seems so harsh. I need to remember that it is only for a short time and that I will be able to eat the occasional sweet, have an alcoholic drink etc. But I don't know if I can trust myself to stop. This script is scaring me.

This is really going to be a journey of self discovery. I need to really work out how to deviate and bring myself back. I haven't been able to do that over the last 20 years. Well, at least I am starting. I appreciate your comments and suggestions.
Jackie

[kagiesen]

Originally Posted by jackie

Thanks for the responses. I will have few food tests coming up soon - and will try to order the meat and veg combo with out the sauces, chips etc to get me through the social event. When I first read my program it seemed like going out to eat was a definite 'no, no'.

Do you ever not order anything - just a have an allowed drink - so that you can still get out with your friends? Is that acceptable to our friends and family? I am so used to drinking and eating because my friends expect me to join in - also because I enjoy it - that eating just 'my medicine' seems so harsh. I need to remember that it is only for a short time and that I will be able to eat the occasional sweet, have an alcoholic drink etc. But I don't know if I can trust myself to stop. This script is scaring me.

This is really going to be a journey of self discovery. I need to really work out how to deviate and bring myself back. I haven't been able to do that over the last 20 years. Well, at least I am starting. I appreciate your comments and suggestions.
Jackie

I reckon that your friends should be supportive of your decision to loose weight, and if Cohens works for you, then just do it. After re-feed you will be able to join in again by sticking to Cohenian food, not overloading the carbs etc. Until then, you'll make your own journey easier if you just don't deviate. Why would your family be opposed to it? I mean, you're starting to get HEALTHY, and is this not what it is about, and should also be important to them/ I find a lot of people who put pressure on you are themselves not healthy eaters, and feel better if you tuck in as well. Just have your dinner, and then drink softdrinks or sparkling water. Or call the restaurant beforehand and let them know you need it for medical reasons and if they can just measure 100 gr of whatever, and 100 of allowed veg as a salad without dressing but vinegar at the side? I've never done that, I just avoid dinner meeting, but there is two coming up soon.

Another thing you could do is fry an allowed serve of meat and then weight it. Then you can take small kitchen scales and weigh it in the restaurant. I mean, it can be a tad embarrassing, but I assume being overweight has been embarrassing at times as well?

Good luck

Katrin

[trishk]

Hi Jackie
I am very new to the programme as well. I have just finished my first 3 weeks. As far as deviations go I have not had any. But that is my choice. I have chosen to put off some social activities so I can stick 100% to my plan. It is a very strict programme isn't it? So I want to get to my goal in the quickest way possible and that means no deviations. I have also found that on other diets eg weight watchers that there is so much room to move that it doesn't work well for me. I find myself over eating and then not going for my weigh in and then after 3 or 4 weeks I don't go at all!!

I met a friend for brunch last week and she ordered gorgeous food and I apologised and had earl grey tea while she ate. Any friend who does not support you and encourage you, I would then only meet for coffee.

I will be travelling on some short trips later this year with my boys and I will take my kitchen scales and buy some fresh supplies when I get there and I think that I will take my electric fry pan in my siutcase and cook up a storm in my hotels!
I wish you all the luck in staying focused and staying on your programme.
Trish

[Kannadew]

G'day!
One of the things that I have done when I have to go out to a meal with friends is actually cook my protein first and take it with me and just order a side salad and then surreptitiously add my chicken or whatever, to it. Its worked a treat and its heaps CHEAPER!!! I have also just ordered plain steak and salad and asked them to be careful how they cook it, because of medical reasons etc... but as my consultant says... you cant guarantee what they do and the more times you eat out that way the more times you potentially sabotage your loss. If I am having a meal at a friends house... I will often take my own food after letting them know in advance.

hope this helps

Kannadew

[Pudge]

Jackie
While I stayed on program while home I did have to travel alot on weekends. I ate as Cohen friendly as possible. I still lost 50 lbs in 4 mos. maybe if I hadn't traveled as much and stayed home I would have done better but I couldn't. So that said when you go to restaurants just order the steak, chicken or broiled fish and salad then eat or try to what you think is the right amount.
Is that the right thing to do maybe not. But that is what I did. Did not eat the bread or potatoe or any of the vegi's that were not allowed. If they didn't have the balsemic vinager I would just use the vinager that came with the oil but didn't use the oil. If they didn't have that I would just not have any dressing on my salad. Everytime we went I had a loss when I got back and weighed.
Most of the time in a 3 day weekend I would have as many as 4 lbs off. Then would continue to lose the rest of the week.
At first you may not want to go out with friends because the temptation is just to great to have things not allowed.
I had many partys and things to go to after the first 2 weeks. I avoided the food tables. I ate before I went to make sure I didn't deviate.
Once you see a loss on the scales or your clothes are fitting looser it will become easier to not deviate or cheat. Then you will want to continue on the program it gets you pretty pumped.

Find a diet drink you like and when you are really hungry have that. Drink your water that helps. Thats what I did and still do. I don't have over 3 a day though and have cut it back to 1 a day only when I need it.
Pudge

[jackie]

Thank you to each and every one of you. You have given me some great ideas and your strength has really inspired me. Today is day 5 for me on the diet and I am feeling a lot more confident about my decision to undertake Cohens. A big incentive is the fact that I have lost 6.6 kgs to date and my clothes are starting to get loose. Mind you that didn't stop me gaining the weight last time I dieted, lost weight, looked and felt great. This time, I keep promising myself will be different. One of the key things that I have been thinking about today is why I am doing the diet - is it a 'diet' or a lifestyle change for me? I am working on the latter and hope to be a convert before the end of the weightloss component of the program. Once again, thanks. I will be taking your ideas with me to a party this weekend. Cheers! With a diet lemonade!

Jackie

[baloo]

A deviation is a deviation. Big or small it will have some effect. The biggest concern is that if you deviate small and get away with it on the scales, you become a bit less strict with yourself and then start to deviate that little bit more when out, then a bit more, then a bit more when at home and before you know it your stuffing another slice of pizza in your mouth while telling yourself "It's ok, I'll be back on it tomorrow".

Learning to cope with the social functions while on the programme is one of the keys to success. Using the "Doctor's orders, medical conditions, must follow it" normally gets people straight off your back and supportive. Learning to pick the right foods off a menu and limiting yourself to what your portion size should be isn't tough. Drinking is something that is harder for your friends to get used to than you. I still had my twice weekly drinks with the boys but I just ordered a pint of soda water for every beer they had. After a while it wasn't tough and even the barmaids would just bring over anothger soda water without asking.

This programme requires discipline and you need to enforce that discipline on yourself 24x7. I managed weddings, work dinners, client dinners and various social events while on the programme. Everytime you manage to succeed in staying on the straight and narrow, you find the next social event becaomse easier to deal with. Set your mind right and while find that it isn't as tough as what it now seems to be.

[anniem]

Hi Jackie

How are you going on your program i have not heard from you for a while was just wondering how you are doing.

From Annie

[cait]

hiya Jackie,
i am also on my 5th day of the Cohens LIFE diet. ( i'm trying to get into my head that although the restrictions are temporary, the lifestyle changes need to be permanent. )
we just had a long weekend and had a BBQ / dinner party for 6 friends. i prepared the food - dips, crackers, pasta salad, pudding, cheese plate - and all the time i was telling myself about that same rule about deviations - one slip here will cost me more than it's worth. it made it so much easier.
in fact, that experience has highlighted for me the things i never knew i did, eating the crumbs from the cheese, eating the crackers if they were already broken etc.
i'm not sure how i'd go eating out - i'm not confident enough to ask the waiter to weigh my food - i figured i'd just order a plain protein with salad and try to only eat what looks like the same amount as i'm allowed on my plan.
i wish you all the best - just keep telling yourself it's so going to be worth it.
i'm keen to hear how you progress, seeing as we started at the same time.
caitlin.

[jackie]

Hello again

And sorry I haven't been back for a while. Life just takes over every now and then. I have two small children plus a hubby and I run an internet business from home which keeps me pretty occupied.

I am now into week 2.5 of the diet and interestingly those deviations I was so worried about initially, have only happened cause I didn't read my booklet thoroughly enough eg. 1 Ryvita sandwich size is = 2 crispbread (drrr!) . Mayonnaise is limited to 1tsp per day .... I was upset at myself for being stupid in missing the details - since I read my booklet quite regularly. Oh well, now I know.

Since my last post I have had several social occasions and have not swayed once. I have thought of missing social occasions (as trishk does) or delay starting Cohens, but I want to be a part of the scene (and have to - kids birthdays etc) plus I think that if I start now, i will look and feel a lot better by Christmas. Though by christmas I might be doing refeeding!

Although I have organised a women's weekend retreat for later this month and that will be the real test. I am planning to take all my own food - precut portion controlled, so that I have no excuse to deviate. Plus I will try what kannadew said, take your cooked protein (I might do cheese instead) and order a salad no oil.

Although I have lost over 7 kilos and my clothes are loose, none of my friends have commented on how much weight I have lost. I am a little disappointed, but then, I think it says more about how I need their approval or noticing. I have thought about this (and what trishk and katrin said) and I need to get over the fact that people need to notice or approve of my program. I am doing this for me. (This will get VERY interesting as I haven;t told my mother in law yet, as she is a dietician and is definitely into the food pyramid concept). She's back from O/S tomorrow, haven't worked out yet how to broach the subject with her.

Before I started Cohens I had joined a gym and pushed the pram to the shops and back a couple of times a week. I have maintained that exercise - and enjoy feeling toned plus the time out away from the family. I know that if I am to keep off the weight, that I will need to maintain an exercise regime as my body retains every ounce of fat it can.

I can relate to what Cait said - I too am surprised at how many times I habitually slip little bits of food into my mouth, crumbs etc... After I have put it in my mouth I go "oh no" and get rid of it (in the bin).

Feeling low on the energy today and would love to have a piece of cake right now. A chocolate cake with thick chocolate icing would do nicely with a white coffee thanks. It has been a draining day since my baby has been unusually unsettled. In the past, I used cakes, biscuits, muffins to help me feel better when the energy levels were low. I like to make my own (and my toddler is a keen cook too), so I can easily whip up a batch of something. Anyway, might go an have a black coffee instead. Should do the trick.

Enjoy your day everyone and thanks!

Jackie

[jlou]

I just found this old post - it looks like Jackie did really well judging from her ticker!

I particularly like Baloo's post...

[FlaMie]

Certainly deviation is a no-no. Don't mistake me for a straight jacketed maniac. I just feel that (and I tend to agree with Baloo) a little deviation will in the end land yourself with less control when you are off the programme. The programme should teach us to learn to say no and NO it is. There's really no point in justifying anything. I try to be very strict with myself as much as I can even though I'm now 4 months into maintenance and I don't see why I shouldn't be. I know I've got a problem with weight control and since Dr Cohen has given me a new lease of life, why should I sabotage myself and upset my entire system all over again?

[Faithy]

Hey Flamie..

I truly do admire you and I have to say I'm so happy you made this comment & I'm even happier that I've read it..
It's so true.. the program really is the first stepping stone.. if we cant stick to that then how will we cope afterwards..
I will admit I am having a tough time of late.. I stuck to the program 100% and was very proud of that but I made the fatal mistake of not letting it sink into my head that this was meant to be a lifestyle change, not just a temporary measure.. I also dont want to live my life indulging for a few days and then sticking to my program for a few days to try & make up for it.. that's so unhealthy & not being realistic in staying yoyo dieting free for life.
I need to stop abusing my body & start loving it & nurturing it.

All to often people just like me forget that occasions are about the people & the event at hand, not the food.. so what if we dont eat what everyone else does, at least they have the pleasure of our company & vice versa..

I can never go back to my old habbits as they are what made me fat & depressed in the first place.. I have to remain strict with myself & stay on this path if I wish to live life to it's fullest & to live hopefully a longer life.

This saying is so true & we all need to let it become part of us "eat to live not live to eat"..

Edit: my hubby just mentioned this to me which really does make a hell of a lot of sense.. an alcoholic who wishes to stay alcohol free can NEVER have even a sip if they wish to remain alcohol free.. are not most of us the same with food.. most of us I'm sure would agree that we are adicts.. we can never afford to slip if we wish to become & stay healthy & slim..

[giddyupgirl]

Faithy your amazing journey has been truly inspirational. I started out my weight loss journey on my own and was doing ok, but after reading your diary and Asy diary I decided to sign up for the Cohens program. I was really concerned about what was going to happen once I lost the weight, how was I going to maintain it. Cohens is giving me the tools to know how much food I need, and that food is for fuel not for entertainment or emotional support. And as you say social events are about the people, not about the food. Thank you for being such an incredible person and inspiration. I am finally settling into the routine of healthy eating and weight loss and not fighting it or myself.

[shuki]

Hey Faithy,
Good to see you back posting again - I also am inspired by your journey - did you ever put any photo's up for us to see? I am glad to hear your feedback on life after Cohen's as that is my fear - how will I deal with that so I don't end up back here.

[mcpsych]

well said faithy
we have to remember who is driving our bus- if you let the fat bstrd drive you will crash straight into the buffet table.
dont let him drive and if possible kick him off the bus