T1's revolution road

[TeeWun]

I am thinking a LOT about the ecology of change... the community of people and circumstances that surround me as I go through self-transformation. This is a GREAT time to change because I have altered the external landscape of that ecology. Having been through family trauma in Jan this year I am no longer feeling the ominous presence of those that judge me, watch me, try and control me. I feel free, and this is what I have waited for. Now I have completed week one of my plan without any deviations or obstacles and I feel so different already. I feel clear.

As my husband says - it's not the destination but the journey that matters, so I will record my journey and reflect on the issues that arise - within me and around me.

5kgs lighter than last Monday. What a relief.

[chicki99]

you have a wise husband, and will be easier with him on your side

[TeeWun]

Thanks chicki99, I am certainly blessed to have a husband like mine. He is doing what he calls s-l-o-w Cohens so he can eat with me and prepare some of the meals for both of us, but he just has no restrictions on his portions, still has coffee with milk and a glass of wine now and then. Amazingly he loses weight faster than me.

[chicki99]

Men always do, gggrrrrrr.
With him in your corner you will do just fine
set yourself up a ticker, its a great reminder to eat well and motivation to stay on track.

[TeeWun]

Ticker installed. Now I feel really great about being on this quest, being set up here makes it feel like a real quest.... yay.

[chicki99]

Glad to see you found it. Keep updating it, weather it goes up or down, it will keep you motivated. It also helps people connect with you when they see your journey 👍

[TeeWun]

Easter passed and I didn't miss chocolate or hot buttered cross buns... so weird, in other years I would have needed to be locked inside so I wouldn't run screaming to the bunny & buns stand at Aldi. This year I didn't leave the house for nearly a week except to buy a bag of tomatoes and some lettuce. What is happening???

A strange thing is that I'm seeing how sick the western model of 'abundance' really is... we are stuffing ourselves to death, and mostly feeding on processed garbage. No wonder our health care system is floundering. How did I do this to myself, I was a thin young woman and gradually... ever so sneakily I succumbed to the aggressive marketing of junk food and fast food and gourmet food,... and why the hell are we so food obsessed? We watch Masterchef, MKR, Gourmet travellers, Jamie Oliver, Gordon Ramsay... when did food prep become compelling entertainment? Why don't we get dressed up and go to nightclubs and hear live music anymore, flirt with adults and dance like our parents and our grandparents did? Now it's just restaurants and movies "I'll have the JUMBO COMBO please. Sheesh.

I'm so sorry I was such a sheep and allowed myself to be a passive participant in this consumer-driven madness.

I'm loving the fact that Cohens BREAKS the food addiction. it stops me feeling and thinking every day is another Christmas day and it must be time to roll out another feast for the family. What's the occasion? Why it's cheap Tuesday again!! Bah.

If I had to grow and hunt my family's food I would not have time to watch Kylie Kwong and trawl through youtube for authentic potsticker recipes. I would be raking something, digging and using my body for the things it was probably actually designed for... that's right, it's survival of the fittest... not the fattest.

I am so over being fat. I can hardly move, I am puffed out, exhausted all the time, drained, dull and disgusting. Underneath all this muck is a me, plotting my escape, one Cohens meal at a time.

Now I remember, plain, wholesome, fresh food in small weighed portions is king!!

....end of diary rant

[lil_doll]

hehe.... It's funny when the veil of junky food gets lifted!

I must say I found it a little too easy to be seduced by it again though! haha ahhh dammit!!


Where are you from, TW?

[TeeWun]

Dear Dr Cohen,

Today I feel very blahhhh. It's hot again and I hate having a sweaty face and clothes that stick to me. Yuck. In my first week of being on the program I dropped 5kgs. It was terrific to see such rapid results. Sadly, it's been another 4 days and my weight is still the same. I know we're not supposed to weigh ourselves so frequently, but can and does anyone actually desist?

Also, I feel very tired and bloated and maybe I have begun to honestly acknowledge the fact of my obesity, this is probably akin to waking up hung-over one day with the realisation that yep, I'm an alcoholic, or a heroin addict, or suddenly very unwell. I guess I have been pretending I'm OK for so long, thinking I can hide my size, get away with it because my face and legs have stayed reasonably normal while my belly is like an apple. I admit that I am Bertie Beetle. But now I just want to be Elvira Eel... I want it tonight, not in 9,33346, 8332 hours from now (or whatever??) I want to stop being an oompa-loompa RIGHT NOW! Please...? (whiney little begging whimper trails off....)

...tantrum over.

Oh, Lil' Doll, I'm living in Brisbane/Australia, but I think I'm from Mars, that's my whole problem right there!!

How about you? - oh I just saw Melbourne at the top right hand of your post. Still there?

[mesmer_eyes]

Hi T1!

Been reading your post but can seem to comment

I like ranting, rants are good. It feels (for me) like the only outlet to 'rebel' against the rigidity of the program. Like, yah I will at least rant coz I will follow the program anyway *pout*..

hope tomorrow is a better day!

[TeeWun]

Thanks Mesmer-eyes, I am sort of treating the diary a bit like it's like an emotional punching bag, because... well, a diary is like that, as well as being a record of the journey. I agree with you that the steam must be released in the process of relinquishing what I call my 'flesh-coloured burqa'. Lol... wish it was that external! But that's the thing, so much of what I have 'buried' is trapped emotions and all the mindless eating just sort of occupied and distracted me from confronting feelings of stress, fear, sorrow, anxiety, uncertainty - yata yata ad nauseum!

Hey, wanna swap bodies, you're so close... EXCITING!!!!

thanks for sharing :^)

PS I'm not really old-Daria, some of my ranting is whimsical and 'ranted with a smile' too.

T1

[mesmer_eyes]

flesh coloured burqa!

totally agree though, about distracting ourselves with food instead of facing our problems head on.. the physical insulation we create for ourselves serves as comfort, and then boom! you have another problem to face-- your weight..

i know im so close.. like within arms reach.. uff totally impatient to get to refeed..

will see you through all this.. me and the other active members. I feel stronger everytime I log in here.. xxx

[TeeWun]

My husband Steve and I started a private yoga class today with a wonderful teacher from India. So lucky to have found her. I am aware of the 'no exercise' guideline, but this is not cardio, not calorie burning, more strengthening and supporting flexibility. The breathing exercises are also very beneficial in the detoxing process. More oxygen to revitalise the cells as they throw out the rubbish. I have listed most of my fattest clothes on ebay and oddly enough I have sold lots. Go figure...? I wanted to FORCE myself to need new clothes rather than just buy stuff to add on the pile. I'm 'Cohensing' my clothes + shoes, handbags perfume and any other excessive accumulations I can live without. My whole family are eating the same as me, they're just having bigger portions and everyone is feeling great. My son lost 2 kgs, my daughter lost 4 and my husband 3, so even though they are eating un-weighed portions, everyone is tossing out rubbish and feeling the benefits of eating properly. My son said he feels clear in his digestion, no bread.

After a few days of no scale changes, I am losing weight again, (5.5kgs or 6kgs @ day 11) so I figure my old plan is doing the trick.

Have felt pretty ordinary for most of the first stretch, I know I had a few chronic diseases taking hold of me, - high blood pressure, Hashimoto's disease, arthritis, fatty liver and menopause (not a disease but sure FEELS like it is), so Cohens is vital to my management of those. For me the detox is bleerrrgggghhh this time around.

A weird thing is happening, when I try and sleep, I keep feeling this bizarre sensation of racing heart/palpitations and a huge adrenalin rush every 10 - 20 mins and it wakes me up with a panic feeling. Maybe its menopause, maybe my body is having a freak out over the total cold turkey boot of sugar, starch, fat and processed food chemicals etc. It's making me very jittery and tired, but scared to go to bed as well. I hope the yoga makes a difference. Still in all... progress is happening. The scales didn't change for a few days but then I woke up this morning and I physically felt smaller, noticeably. Another kilo was gone, but I know it's all a moveable quotient at this stage, so I'll weigh myself again on Monday which will be 2 weeks in.

Over and out.

[TeeWun]

Chugging along, have tried a few wonderful recipes from this forum. Have lost another 1.6kgs - total lost in 3 weeks is 6.6kgs. I'm very happy, the old plan is still working and so far, so good. Only deviations so far have been a couple of extra crackers on days when I was struggling to make it to the next meal. If it slowed down my losses, I'm OK with that. The hunger is under control and I'm not tempted by food prepared outside of my own kitchen. This seems to be a major breakthrough this time, if I (or my family) didn't prepare it... it's not food. I'm blessed by the fact that my husband and two (grown-up) kids are taking turns to prepare meals according to the correct allowances (I have the program firmly attached to the fridge) and this is making it so much easier. Everyone is developing their own specialty Cohens meal. My son makes delicious spicy chicken salad, my husband makes heavenly Italian beef, my daughter is the tuna queen and I make whatever looks good from the recipe section on this forum. We, as a family are appreciating the benefits of eating properly - the fam' don't adhere to the portion allowances, so they are happy and I am getting wonderful support. The challenge is to never accept invitations to parties, dinners. lunches, tea parties or shopping malls... hmmm, it just gets so political trying to explain for the umpteenth time why I can't just bend the rules.... why do we as a society try our best to dissaude each other from making positive changes in our lives??? Weird.

Thanks for the marvellous incentives, resources, encouragement and efforts of everyone who has journeyed/moderated and contributed to this wonderful forum.

[lil_doll]

Hey TW!

6.6 kgs is great! And it's awesome that your family can help you out and benefit from it too

I always find at the beginning it is best to try and avoid social things where serious food is involved (ie: actually going for lunch, or going out for dinner) and wait until you are so far in the zone and already have made a good dent in your journey to have the strength to say no and not worry what other people think!

Keep it up

[mesmer_eyes]

wow.. congrats on the weighloss t1! and you are so lucky to have your family members cooking for you!!

[TeeWun]

Thanks Missy and Mesmer_eyes... I really appreciate your company on this road. Even though my family are with me on this, it's still me that has to fight my addictions every step of the way. Mostly up till now, I have been feeling so good about doing this, it makes me feel secure knowing I am doing something finally about all the weight-related problems that my body is struggling to deal with.

Today is hard. Don't know why, but I feel predator-hungry and sort of flat, like the excitement of starting Cohens again is fading and now I am facing the long uphill battle. I have some other health problems going on, so I tend to be a complete food-sook and just want to eat/sleep/eat/sleep until I feel better, but now I really need to be a grown up. Yikes!!

Did either of you feel suddenly daunted by imagining an endless future of teeny meals and nary a hot chip dunked in gravy to be had...? Sigh... adulthood is hard. (says she at 51 )

It's suddenly really cold in Brisbane (weirdly) and I can't seem to get warm, I am wearing 3 sweaters and ugg boots and I have 2 doonas on my bed and I still feel cold.

Another day, another glass-a-water.

talk to you gals soon.

T1

[Butterflywings]

Hi T1,

I'm in Brissie too and the chill OMG. However, apart from the weather, that is a common experience so many of us have a month or two into plan. The bone chilling cold that you just can't warm up from when others around you don't feel it. In my experience, it does go after time. I'm cold today, but not to the bone as I have been over the last year.

There is certainly a honeymoon period to the plan. The first month, is great, you see results, you set routines, you continue to be motivated by the scales, clothes getting bigger and so on. Then, if you read through the diaries of those who are on a longer journey (like me) there are definately periods where it all looks uphill, even though you are losing the weight, the time and routine do get to you, it feels never ending and you have to work hard to punch your way through this.

Everything you are feeling today, sounds absolutely normal to me, as I (and i would feel confident in saying - many) have felt it too.

Stay rugged up. RE: the hot chips. As I said to ME last week. The hot chips will be there always. They aren't going to disappear from off the planet, and when you are at goal, you can taste them then. They are not going anywhere.

[TeeWun]

Hi Butterflywings, thanks for the encouragement. You've already lost so much weight, that must feel amazing for you. Good woman!!

Yes, Bris is so cold... but it's such a lovely respite from the usual steambath. Guess I'll just need to wear a sleeping bag for the next few months.

Sheesh, the honeymoon is over already? I just wish I could win Lotto and hire Cohens chefs for all my forum friends... we could swan around in a stretch limousine buying fabulous clothes together, and Marcelo or Pastiche could text us when our M2s were ready .

A strange thing happened today. I went to the doctor to find out the results of a comprehensive blood test I had last week - I have been having really strange heart palpitations, big adrenalin surges, dizzy spells and panic feelings, especially when I go to bed...? I have been taking HRT for a year and a half, diagnosed as menopausal around 6 months before that. Since I started Cohens 3 weeks ago, I have been bleeding, and today I learned that I am no longer menopausal!! The doctor and I were both shocked. No more HRT for me... too much estrogen causing all the weird symptoms. So interesting that it happened almost immediately when I started on the program. Just demonstrates how much my body was struggling to function on the wrong fuel.

Wow.. no wonder this diet works for women attempting to conceive.

Please dear Jesus, Allah, Buddha, Baha'ullah, Zoroaster... (why are they all blokes??) please don't send me any more babies, I'm too tired.

Mmmmmmnnnn saladas.... (Homer Simpson groan).

[Butterflywings]

That's an amazing result from your doctors visit!!! Some people have the most amazing health improvements from this plan. I only really had "suspected" high blood pressure. The problem is, I don't really know how is tracking because I get so stressed during the process of having the cuff on and getting a bad result that I can't relax to get a proper read. I last had it done at the doctors in January, it was a touch high she said, but considering I was sitting I there having it taken after a Pap smear and being told the lumps in my breast was suspicious... I think I was suitable stressed to have it high.. Lol. I need to but my own machine and practice so I can not panic and get accurate readings. It's kind of important as heart disease is very high on my dad's side. Often stress related. Any who, I'm taking it for granted that it must gave improved by now. . Congrats again on the great result and keep warm, it's chilly tonight